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The Joke Thread

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by phantomcmeyer, March 14, 2012.

?

You may be a redneck if....

  1. The new drinking limit is 25 and you want them to keep alcohol out of school

    3 vote(s)
    7.5%

  2. You lit a match in your bathroom and it blew your house right off it's wheels

    8 vote(s)
    20.0%

  3. You think fast-food is hitting a possum at 65 mph

    29 vote(s)
    72.5%
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  1. Arwenden

    Arwenden

    • Senior Moderator
    Joined:
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    Arwenden
    What is the difference between a battery and your mother-in-law?

    Answer:
    A battery has a positive side.
     
    Arwenden, April 18, 2012
    #41
    HaydoJ and DunkMastaZ like this.
  2. czeck6

    czeck6

    • Vip
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    A programmer is asked by his wife to go to the grocery store to pick up some milk.
    She tells him, "Get a gallon of milk, and if they have eggs, grab a dozen".
    When he comes home with twelve gallons of milk she says "Why the hell did
    You get Twelve Gallons Of Milk?".
    He says, "They had eggs."
     
    czeck6, April 19, 2012
    #42
  3. tchand

    tchand

    Joined:
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    TChand
    LOL
     
    tchand, April 19, 2012
    #43
  4. Tuste

    Tuste

    • Vip
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    this is bad im sorry i just hope i dont get banned i got two of them first a clean/ dirty joke

    Clean joke: i took a bath with bubbles
    Dirty joke: bubbles is the girl next door

    and now for a gross and alot grosser

    whats gross.....a 1,000 babies stapled to a tree
    Whats grosser......1 baby stapled to a 1,000 different trees
     
    Tuste, April 19, 2012
    #44
  5. alvar_m

    alvar_m

    Joined:
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    In-Game Name:
    alvar_m
    A blind man walks to a bar, starts spinning his dog around and bartender ask's. What are you doing man.
    ....Meh just looking around.
     
    alvar_m, April 20, 2012
    #45
  6. Travis10123

    Travis10123

    Joined:
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    Travis10123
    why did the chicken cross the road

    ( because it just did )
    heheheheee ugh my life is sad.....
     
    Travis10123, April 20, 2012
    #46
  7. Mehrin

    Mehrin

    Joined:
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    Mehrin
    What do you call a frenchman on holiday?
    Philippe Follope
    If you don't get it, read it out loud.
     
    Mehrin, April 21, 2012
    #47
  8. bigmacthekee

    bigmacthekee

    Joined:
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    bigmacthekee
    why arent dinosaurs alive...they forgot to get on the arc
     
    bigmacthekee, April 22, 2012
    #48
  9. protohedron

    protohedron

    Joined:
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    protohedron
    Two men walk into a bar..... the third man ducked. :p
     
    protohedron, April 22, 2012
    #49
  10. jhvtdi

    jhvtdi

    Joined:
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    jhvtdi
    A blond, a brunette and a redhead are stranded on an island 10 miles from shore. On the first day the brunette swims out 3 miles before drowning. On the second day the redhead swims 7 miles before being eaten by a shark. On the third day the blond swims 9 miles, gets tired, and swims back.
     
    jhvtdi, September 22, 2012
    #50
    RyanRugenus likes this.
  11. Jonney

    Jonney

    • Diamond
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    ImSloppy
    Here is a joke thinking of a relationship i once had (a girl with a bad attitude, big selfish ego, and the gardener for the ugly tree!!! lmao)

    IN MY DEFENSE

    i was so desperate at the time, young
    and so so so self centered and stupid!

    ==========================​

    Wife: "How would you describe me?"
    Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
    Wife: "What does that mean?"
    Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
    Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
    Husband: "I'm just kidding!"

    MWA HA HAH HA HA!

    -SLOPpY-
     
    Jonney, December 4, 2014
    #51
    KiddieWish likes this.
  12. porterdog02

    porterdog02

    • Gold
    Joined:
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    In-Game Name:
    PorterYT
    Why did the chicken cross the road?

    To tell notch I want to become a block and get killed and eaten!



    (I was bored at school didn't know what to do sorry if it's not funny)
     
    porterdog02, December 4, 2014
    #52
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