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Writing Challenge (Forum Game) #2 - into creative writing?

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by Charliesaurus, November 9, 2012.

  1. Charliesaurus

    Charliesaurus

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    So! Going back to this thread, I'd like to make another one at others requests!
    For those who would like a more personal community of writers, take a look at my idea here in suggestions and please show your support!
    Thank You!
    Music Challenge!
    Rows upon rows of men stood as the polluted smog was inhaled by the warriors mouths. The rustle of blades of grass created a wave of ambiance in the vast meadow where the war was about to begin. The two generals spoke in the center of events, keeping their swords at arms. Mottled plumage of horsehair helmets were parallel in movement with the feathers of green which lay upon this awaiting bloodshed plane. What were known as the 'Meadows of Heaven' were cursed with awaiting death, and mourning from those who await to lose their loved ones in the battle.
    It was not long before the two had parted their ways and began raising their voices in commands to their battalions. The sleek sheet of sweat was dripping from every mans bare back, a thin leather strap and kilt their only protection and armor against their enemy. Painted upon their faces were the blue stripes of their country, and their pride. The occasional grunt from the horses echoed through the ears, past the lengthy hair of the men. Then finally came the chime of the war cry, and the raise of spears, shields, daggers and booming brave vocals.
    "Charge!" Shouted the general, as his own sword came arise on the back of his chesnut horse, marked with blue paint also in replica with the army of wooden shields. Moments it took before the thick roar of metallic weeping could be heard in the villages nearby. Sparks were flying off of the impact of weapons, which have awaited so long to taste the iron of their kindred.
     
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  2. Gawkan

    Gawkan

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    Not to be rude but could you of carried it on in the other thread?
     
  3. Charliesaurus

    Charliesaurus

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    I much prefer having a fresh start. It's a different song too, so to save confusion on who should reply to which thread I chose to post it on another one.
     
  4. Gawkan

    Gawkan

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    hmm ok
     
  5. Arwenden

    Arwenden

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    War was coming, that was certain. When it was going to happen was still a mystery. But it didn’t matter, they had to prepare themselves. You could hear the bashing of the blacksmith’s hammer on the metal. The metal which was being shaped into armoury and weapons. The sound of it was not comforting their feelings about their future, about the war.
    The time had come, they had to go. Everyone was saying farewell to their families. All giving each other blessings, promises of returning to them were made. However, those were of no use. You could see the despair in all eyes when they rode away, facing war.
    The horses were nervous, the young men were nervous, everyone was. Standing there on the battlefield, just waiting for it to happen was nerve wrecking. Breath clouds filled the air, the sun was rising. How weak they may look, every man shared the same goal; to protect their families. That made them strong, that united them.
    In the heat of the battle many died. The sound of clashing swords, prancing horses, all disappeared fast. The battle didn’t take very long, but it took many lives. In the end, the men successfully defended their homeland.
    They buried their comrades and honoured all by promising them to look after their families. Then they went back to their own families, to their homeland. With pain in their hearts they had to tell the devastating news.
    Many of them were never the same after the war, they all told their offspring about the terrible deeds of the enemy and of war. But in vain, for it happened again and again through many generations. Human war was and still is inevitable.
    Ronan Hardiman composes wonderful Irish music! ;) I especially know him from the Lord of the Dance of course, haha.
     
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  6. Charliesaurus

    Charliesaurus

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    Loved your post and loved the little moral ending - you always manage to think on the same wavelength aha :) love your writing style too.

    Yes too much of a fan of his music and Lord of the dance is ammmuurzing!
     
  7. FaTd33r

    FaTd33r

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    This may be one of my first attempts to write a story in english. give some feedbacks!


    Entering into the deep Vale of the Broken Mountains, the hero was finally close to reach his lifetime goal.

    When he was still a kid, the elder was always regrouping the people from the village, to speak of tales. Since then, he kept in mind that this tale was true, and now there he is.

    Still heading into the deep and dark valley, he starts to see a bright light coming from a cave.
    "Could this be it? What I've been looking for after all this time?"
    He kept walking,but there was a really strange feeling of beeing seen by many eyes. He kept walking through it, and there it was: The Sword of the Forgotten King.He was about to get his hand on it, and suddenly, a force pushed him back. Looking around, he found out that his feeling was right. The fight was unavoidable.

    Creepy creatures, uncomparable to the ugliest thing he ever saw, was there, sprinting towards him to defend their treasure. He groped his axe, and place himself in a steady position to counter their attacks. He fought for about an hour, against a threat that was never close to an end. It just seemed like their wounds were always cured in the dark.. Using his mind, he looked for a source of light; the only one was a small hole above the Sword. He ran to it, took it up and made it shine towards the beasts. They were melting into the light, as this was too pure for them to fight.

    The threat was gone, and the fight was over. He walked out, and took it back into to his vilage, where he is claimed like an hero. The only thing he had to say, was:
    "Keep in mind your goal, fight for it; you will be sure to claim it as yours someday."
     
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  8. will_kim

    will_kim

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    Nice story but I believe it would be nice to make it a tad longer, with more vivid details and action :)
     

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